Metro to provide free sideshow entertainment

We all know that the "highlight of the day" for any good citizen of the imperial District is when he or she gets the honor of knocking anyone standing on the right left side of the Metro escalator out of the way, but now, Metro also wants you to enjoy some live entertainment!

Metro officials will be making some musical moves later Thursday. The transit agency is launching a pilot program providing live entertainment at some Metrorail station entrances over the summer and during the winter holiday season.

Auditions are set for Thursday evening and Saturday at Metro's downtown headquarters.

MetroPerforms is a joint effort by Metro and the D.C. Arts Commission to find acts to perform at subway stations in the District. Similar auditions are planned to find acts to feature in Prince George's and Montgomery counties.

Right, let's turn the whole damn thing into a circus, like people on the metro need any more reason to smell like vomit and garbage.